A plague upon my house!

So, I’m sure all 3 of you who read this will realize I’ve been absent for a second. We’ve been sick. Like epic, end-times, plague sick.



Hubby left February 11 for Italy and I woke up that morning with no voice. (No voice with 3 kids, by myself…perfect.)We’ve had upper respiratory infection, allergy crap, the flu and I am currently being treated for strep.  Amazing, right?

All of this down time has given me a lot of downtime with my buddy Duo.  As in Duolingo. In completing the lessons, I found Duo says some surprising things to me.  For instance:


I don’t like where this is going.

img_2387How did he know?!?!?!?!?!

fullsizeoutput_149cLet me guess? You want a ham sammach too?

img_2392-2Yes, rub it in rest of the world. #standardisstupid

img_2389-2Only if you’re a Cullen. #EGBTT

img_2391-2WHAT is taking him so long? Mama is thirsty!

fullsizeoutput_149bYou’re making me uncomfortable Duo. 😳

NB: I was so hopped up on meds, I thought I should take a picture of my iPad screen with my phone versus a screen shot.  That explains why some look crazy and some are normal. Judge away!


No Habla

Since we found out our family will be moving to Italy in June…JUNE Y’ALL!! We’ve been in crunch mode. It is a mere 4 months away. FOUR MONTHS!!! Feeling an anxiety attack coming on, I popped an Effexor and got to work.

I do not speak Italian outside of what I learned in my college Art History classes & the Olive Garden menu (this IS the south). French? Oui! Spanish? Un poco. Italian? IDK my BFF Rose? After doing some research and talking with other expats, we decided to use Duolingo.


This is Thing 1 using Duolingo.  She is 8. She is already more proficient than me.

Being nerds, we also bought an Italian textbook. Big surprise, it’s called “Ciao!”. (Shocking, right?) In an additional stroke of genius, the Hubster decided we should label common words/things/rooms around the house.


This is on the front and back of all doors.  It does a good job of confusing guests and deterring Mormons.

I thought colored notecards would be helpful…apparently I should’ve thought it out better.


Laundry room or purple? Your guess is as good as mine.

Some hit a little to close to home.


Parents bedroom or janitor’s closet? As a SAHM, sometimes I feel like its the latter.

Athough we will get a tutor when we arrive, I’d like to try not to be like Karl Pilkington from An Idiot Abroad. We’ll keep labeling and Duolingo-ing until June.


Anytips for language learning? Did I butcher any of the labels? Let me know!

Italy Y’all!

Well, its officially official!!! We are moving to Italy. Hubby got the official word a couple months ago, but now everything is in full swing. I’m freaking out a little…



But just a little.  It’s all so exciting and kind of romantic.  Italy Y’all! If you know my family at all, the Griswald’s are likely coming to mind. Being a true child of the 80’s, I had the same visions.


In the meantime, the Mister is about to leave on a pre-expatriation 90-day business trip. I’ll be left to my own devices with Things 1, 2 & 3 in the interim. The insanity will surely begin soon. I hope you all will join me along this journey. There is sure to be lots of laughter (mostly at myself), a few tears and plenty of “Jesus take the wheel” moments…but I promise to never sing.


Welcome to Italy Y’all!!